A Wonder of a Woman

I heard an amazing story on PBS Newshour on a woman who literally freed herself from the worst of circumstances:

Uganda has a serious domestic abuse problem and when women fight back, the penalties can be harsh. Susan Kigula was sentenced to death for killing her husband when she was twenty-one years old.

She shared a cell meant for one person with three other women.

She started a school on death row. She established a choir. She was a leader in the prison church.

The African Prisons Project got her admitted to the University of London in 2011 to study for a law degree by correspondence. She was one of the university’s best students in human rights law.

She led a case, Attorney General vs Susan Kigula, challenging the mandatory sentencing for murder and armed robbery. As a result of this case, Susan and hundreds of others were released from death row.

She completed her law degree and now trains women in prison in the law so they can use it to protect their families and their communities.

Why am I telling you about Susan Kigula?

Because if she could free herself (and many others) from prison…from death row!, then we can free ourselves from our SELF-IMPOSED prisons. Connect to your inner Wonder Woman. She’s there.

“An Australian nurse, who cared for people in the last twelve weeks of their lives, recorded their most often discussed regrets. The top regret: ‘I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.'” (from the book Essentialism)

It’s my life mission to live this and bring as many women with me as possible.

Get Your Life.

If work is your ‘prison’ or you’re simply ready for a career change, don’t miss the Your Next Move teleclass! And because I got a little distracted with a few other things going on in my business, my distraction is your benefit! Doing a fill-up-the-class discount. See link for new date and price, https://crenecoach.com/your-next-move/

P.S. Click the link to hear the full PBS piece on Susan’s story and Alexander McLean, the activist and founder of the Ugandan-based African Prisons Project, http://www.pbs.org/newshour/bb/im-starting-worlds-first-prison-law-school/.

The Slug Zone

slug1
sləɡ/
noun
  1. 1.
    a tough-skinned terrestrial mollusk that typically lacks a shell and secretes a film of mucus for protection. It can be a serious plant pest.
  2. 2.
    a slow, lazy person; a sluggard.

I’ve been in slug mode since yesterday. Returned from a great business trip where I coached my face off doing sessions for a group of powerful women. Then I crashed.

Was feeling pretty guilty about this at first. I’ve got Work. To Do.

But I needed ‘slow and lazy’ so I caved. I’m letting you see my shell-less tough-skinned self because the serious danger is in the pretense.

SLAY Every Day is a powerful siren call. So many of the women I coached were living multi-tasking lives on steroids! Achieving amazing work goals while taking care of families, moving across the country, contributing to their communities, and more. Exhaustion is normal. When to stop is a hanging question. And this is not peculiar to this group. It’s also not sustainable. The body will whisper then scream for loving attention.

What I’m grateful for is honoring my desire to create a life flexible enough to SLAY and SLUG. Definitely not an easy path, but I’ll choose it ANY day over the caged life.

I do 80/20 this too, so it’s time to get back on it!

Are you feeling SLAY or SLUG this week? You get to choose. And if it doesn’t feel like a choice, let’s talk.

It’s time to Free Yourself.

 

P.S. If you don’t like…or even hate…your work situation. Fix That! Join the upcoming teleclass, Your Next Movehttps://crenecoach.com/your-next-move/

Done Ditherin’

A friend asked me what I was doing over the holiday weekend. When I responded that I would be working, she exclaimed, “Working?!” in a tone that implied it was a bad thing. Five years ago, it would have been.

I had a bad case of burnout. I was two years from official retirement from a long and successful career, but was struggling mightily to keep going. Crying jags before I walked in the building. Weekly Sunday evening descents into a funk, which my husband tagged as ‘raining in the house’. Continuous prayer and petition to God asking for the motivation to keep going. The temporary salve of trips and shopping sprees that were just that..temporary.

The short version of how I worked through all of that drama:

I quit.

My final epiphany came to me sitting in my office and realizing that it wasn’t the company, it was me. Something else my husband told me(such a smart man!) was true…God was packing my bags. There were at least a hundred people who would gladly sit in my seat. The job wasn’t bad. It was simply(or not so simply) time for a new life chapter. And while the timing didn’t seem right (who can’t hold out two more years??), it was a huge trust and believe lesson.

I trusted that God had a different and better plan for me.

I believed in myself enough to know that writing that new chapter as I go is plan enough.

“God told me if I painted it enough, I could have it.” ~ Georgia O’Keefe on her obsession with painting Pedernal Mountain

Freedom is my obsession. I will paint it over and over to experience its many manifestations. Has it been all tiptoeing through tulips? Nope! Thorns and briars snag me. They teach me but never stop me. And I’m in the midst of an incredible adventure figuring it all out. Haven’t had one day of regret over leaving.

This is American Independence Day. I’m admittedly conflicted about what and who it represents, but I have no conflict re PERSONAL independence. Faith and Freedom fuel everything I do. Shackles off!

Yes, I’m working over the holiday, but it’s MY choice and I’m enjoying it, not obligating it.

If work feels like bondage for you, another great coach, Gwen Hall, and I have partnered to guide you through FREEING YOURSELF during a six week teleclass, Your Next Move. Not only is Gwen an incredible coach, she’s also my former boss. See, I was smart enough to jump off the bridge before I blew it up! If you’re operating on fumes, be smart enough to do the same.

Check out the details here, Your Next Movehttps://crenecoach.com/your-next-move/

And whether you opt-in or not…take one small step towards the life you really want to be living. Then take another.

Stop ditherin’.

P.S. If freedom is your jam too, I started a book club and the first book, Freedom Seeker is a wonderful exploration on 8 Keys to freedom that help you get clear on what really matters to you and how you can have it. Online book discussion July 27th. Sign-up here, https://crenecoach.com/the-l-t-s-g-book-cluba-crenecoach-jam/

 

One 800 Got Junk

When people ask me what I do as a life coach, I typically reply that I help women close the gap between their A(where they are now) and their B(where they want to be). I saw a commercial for the 1-800-got-junk company and it struck me that I’m also in the junk removal business.

They get rid of your:

appliances

electronics

carpet

mattresses…and more.

I guide you through getting rid of your mental junk:

complacency

lack of confidence

inertia

externalizing

obligated living…whatever is not serving you.

And I do this from a place of having been there too. From a place of falling back into one of those holes from time to time. From a place of knowing that remaining there is not an option for optimal living.

What I love about coaching is that there are  all kinds of paths to do the work: retreats, vision board events, Desire Map workshops, group teleclasses and individual sessions, etc.

My latest option: the L.T.S.G. BOOK CLUB!! Reading is my jam AND my jelly! And this is going to be a no-stress, up-level your life club. Interested?? Check out the details here and sign up! There’s a cool mug giveaway waiting on you! https://crenecoach.com/the-l-t-s-g-book-cluba-crenecoach-jam/

 

P.S. If part of the junk clogging up your mind is job misery, I’ve got you covered there too. I and another kick-A coach, Gwen Hall, have teamed up to help you find work you love during a six week teleclass, Your Next Movehttps://crenecoach.com/your-next-move/

Enrollment is open!

 

The Harvest is in The Scars

“We’ve all fallen We have the skinned knees and bruised hearts to prove it. But scars are easier to talk about than they are to show. With all the remembered feelings laid bare. And rarely do we see wounds that are in the process of healing. Dr. Brené Brown

How’s your summer going? It’s been a minute since I’ve sent a blog/newsletter. Great things have been happening in cReneCoach world, I:

– ended my (visiting coach) participation in a wonderful local mentoring program for executive women, Learned much from the monthly sessions (and from the program’s powerhouse founder) and met some Fab mover/shaker women(staff and participants)…

– kicked off my Master Coach certification journey with in an incredible week in an art museum hotel with 11 other women who are now sisters, not just classmates…

– rolled out the Desire Map workshop with a group of incredibly engaged women who connected to the value in asking what’s become one of my two foundational life compass questions: How do you want to feel? (The other is the BARE question: Does this feel like love?)…

– soft launched what will become a cReneCoach/2WiseCrew signature program: Your Next Move, the teleclass to end all teleclasses that guides you in getting work that supports the life you want to live…

– FINALLY figured out the movement/eating recipe that works for my body!

So why did I open with a quote about scars? Why am I showing you my scarred knees? Because, instead of celebrating what’s going well, I’ve been beating myself up about what I :

No new clients picked up from the executive group…investing more $$ in my business than I’m bringing in…my house is a mess…Your Next Move won’t sell out…my thighs are still too big…Waa! Waa! Waa!

I literally cried out to God(cuz that’s MY roll), asking for ‘am I on the right path’ direction. I LOVE this path but shouldn’t I be further along on it? And thankfully, the response was quick: This is the messy part…the creating/building part…the figuring it out, bruising/scarring part. But yes, this is your path. I’ve got you. You’re in the midst of your harvest.

Woo Sa! Then that message was repeated in the Brené Brown Super Soul Sunday Rising Strong interview I just ‘happened’ upon. Repeated in my daily devotion re trusting God’s plans. Repeated today’s blogs from life coaches, Cheryl Richardson and Danielle LaPorte. And repeated in the midst of writing this post, in the unexpected email from one of my Desire Map workshop attendees: “So go ahead my sister, handle ‘yo’ business. Because I am telling you that your light is resonating in my life for sure…I’m just saying stay LIT UP.”

YASSSSSSSS!! LIT UP is exactly how coaching FAB women makes me feel. The scars you CAN’T see are why I do this. It’s not all fun and happy…even (and especially!) for a life coach. ‘But a winner don’t quit on herself’ and I’m in for the win…for ALL of us. I’m re-working my faulty perceptions. These scarred knees have brought me far and have more beautiful places to take me, literally and figuratively.

Woo Sa!

P.S. If you (or someone you’re tired of hearing whine!) are not happy in your day job, get yourself signed up for one of ONLY twelve spaces for Your Next Move. The smart women who do will not only get a deep dunk in determining their best path for change during an enlightening group experience, they’ll also receive one-on-one coaching delivered by two gifted coaches, https://crenecoach.com/your-next-move/

P.P.S. The Desire Map Retreat is coming this fall! Click here to be put on the interest list and get all the details.

P.P.S. I’ve met some great coaches! One of the best and smartest is Maggie Reyes, who lives her talk and has the mantra, Create a Life You Love with the Love of Your Life. I’ve been coached by Maggie and if you want to preempt couple issues or dig out of the hole you’re in, contact Maggie ASAP at ModernMarried.com

Your Summer of Slay

 

 

Hello Queens!!

I’ve been on a mini-writing break doing a business reset. I did a Facebook live declaring May my month of Mindulfuness and Manifestation(I do love alliteration!) and WOW!! It’s Ah-Mazing what happens when you intentionally invest the time to propel yourself forward.

Last year, my focus was on my What(run a coaching business or be a coaching employee?) and Who(my ideal client?). This is my year of How…how to target my business to women who are ready to invest the time and funds to LIVE THE LIFE THEY CRAVE. Women who are done with short-term fixes and are willing to do the work that reaps the life-long benefit of WALKING IN THEIR FREEDOM.

NOW.

Because what I know for sure is that there’s no secret or magic bullet.

It’s about Connection.

Connecting to your inner truth and guiding light.

Connecting to what you want more than you’re afraid of it.

Connecting to your Ikigai. Say what???

This graphic is the visual for the Japanese concept of Ikigai.

“The term ikigai is composed of two Japanese words: iki referring to life, and kai, which roughly means “the realisation of what one expects and hopes for”. Unpacking the word and its associated symbol a bit further, ikigai is seen as the convergence of four primary elements:

* What you Love (your passion)
* What the World Needs (your mission)
* What you are Good at (your vocation)
* What you can get Paid for (your profession)

The word ikigai, that space in the middle of these four elements, is seen as the source of value or what make one’s life truly worthwhile. In Okinawa, Japan, ikigai is thought of as ‘a reason to get up in the morning’.” (From the article, Finding Your Reason For Being, http://upliftconnect.com/ikigai-finding-your-reason-for-being/)

Do you want to know your reason for being? Or Do you know and also know you aren’t living it??

Well, if you’re sick and tired of being sick and tired of living less than,

THIS is your Summer to Slay That Shizz!

Rock Your Roll and START 2018 where you want to be: adding another flavor of icing to your cake instead of trying once again to bake it!

Full details coming on The Let Your Sh*t Go package of coaching opportunities:

THE DESIRE MAP WORKSHOPS—The Two-program process for clarifying what you truly want in every area of your life, and using that powerful awareness to guide your choices from now on; based on Danielle LaPorte’s wonderful book of exhale, The Desire Map, https://smile.amazon.com/Desire-Map-Guide-Creating-Goals-ebook/dp/B00H7MKSRY/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1494102882&sr=1-1&keywords=The+desire+Map. Opt-in link coming.

THE GET THE WORK YOU LOVE e-course, https://app.convertkit.com/landing_pages/88307?v

THE GET THE BODY YOU LOVE BARE GROUP tele-class: No dieting, just loving awareness and pleasure. Opt-in link coming.

THE MIRAVAL CELEBRATION RETREAT: The BARE GROUP wrap-up and celebration at this FANTABULOUS resort and spa!! Opt-in link coming.

P.S. I created all this goodness on a solo Create and Plan retreat inspired by my bookkeeper, Ariane Trélaün posting about hers. I traveled about 50 miles away to be undistracted but not unreachable and it was bliss! Highly recommend for any reason you need to do some serious clear thinking.

P.P.S. For those who partake, here’s a link to some fun libations. I’m on the cusp of Leo/Virgo and going with the Leo Ginger Sparkle on this one because I LOVE ginger and sparkle! Let me know yours. http://www.travelandleisure.com/food-drink/cocktails-spirits/zodiac-inspired-drink-recipes?xid=NL_TLDaily050517

 

Free to FLOW!

Several years before I ended my corporate career, I was in a meeting listening to our department VP talk about the book, Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. Flow is “a state of consciousness that makes an experience genuinely satisfying…people experience deep enjoyment, creativity, and a total involvement with life.” I’m sure most of you have heard the expression (especially from athletes), “I’m in the zone.” This is flow. My VP was connecting it to the Human Resources Dept. creating a higher level of work engagement for our employees. I connected to NOT FEELING IT!

And I actually had felt it during my tenure there, particularly in my early HR years. Coming to Human Resources felt like I’d finally found my work home. I now know that in each of the positions I held(recruiter, soft skills trainer, management development manager), I was gathering information and honing my skill level in what would fully and ultimately represent flow for me: coaching clients on my terms. Remember: Nothing’s wasted!

Serving people through my gift of ‘free-your-mind/get your life’ coaching…YES. Corporate strategy and processes…NO!

Flow is in my head because I experience it often now, working with clients. And I was TOTALLY in my Flow Zone during my retreat(finding creative ways to provide a wonderful coaching experience is a flow requirement for me). I’m doing the current Oprah/Deepak meditation series, Hope In Uncertain Times and in Day 8, Oprah mentions flow:

“I believe hope flourishes when you are In. The. Flow. I remember a photo I pulled from O Magazine of a woman gliding through water. It was such a striking image of freedom and possibility, I put it on my vision board. Some time later after a swimming lesson, I passed by my vision board and had an AHA moment. I’d become that woman gliding through the water. For years, I’d been a challenged swimmer, afraid of the water…fighting it. I believe that all I needed to learn was to move with the flowwww…literally. This is one of the great metaphors of life.

Move with the flow. Don’t fight the current. RESIST NOTHING. Let life carry you. Don’t try to carry it.

Deepak tells us, if you get this idea…that this moment, is the only moment you have…then you live in the present and you MOVE WITH THE FLOW of that. The point of arrival is NOW. So many of us look to the future for a moment of happiness or contentment. I will be happy when… But when we get there, we don’t recognize it because we are not present for IT. And That’s how many people lose hope. They miss the moment!”

Are you in your flow? Or are you in a trickle? A drought? Are you paying attention to what’s tickling OR prickling your consciousness? Are you swimming or drowning? I fought the messages for a long time because they didn’t seem ‘right’. I prayed, begged, and pleaded with God to let me be happy on the traditional track to retirement. Clearly, he wasn’t hearing THAT! Ohhhh the misery that only got worse. Thankfully, though, even in the midst of what had become work hell, I was grateful and remained enough ‘in the moment’ to not miss the joys of my very blessed life. I didn’t lose all hope.

I came to the realization, that the company wasn’t my issue. The issue was my ignoring that a life chapter had ended. I had received what I came to learn and it was time to move on. Time to create my new Flow. So I did. Helping you find YOUR Flow is MY Flow!

If work is NOT your happy place, then you’ll want to check out my upcoming online course, How To Get The Work You Love.

It’s a self-study that shows you how to:

  • determine what work represents for you: Your passion and contribution in the world OR a great income and flexibility to live your passion outside of work.
  • create an action plan(based on your response to above) that gets you the work-life you crave
  • FLOW!!!

Don’t want to wait? Contact me now…cReneCoach.com

P.S. There are still a few spots left for Dancing in the Dark + Coaching. You really don’t want to miss this! https://www.eventbrite.com/e/dancing-in-the-dark-coaching-tickets-33178980223

 

 

BARE-ing the Before & After

Some of the most popular stories are makeover stories, right?? The miserable or plain face ‘before’ followed by the dramatically beautiful BIG reveal of the ‘after’…after the weight loss…after the cosmetics. We see this in countless magazine articles, news segment pieces, and big loser type shows. And we eat it up because ‘the visual’ is so appealing and aspirational!

What I love about BARE is that The BEFORE is a head/heart focus. It’s about changing AND LOVING  how you see yourself…RIGHT NOW. It’s about ending the hiding and owning the BEAUTY that is YOU…RIGHT NOW. Wearing the cute clothes NOW. Rockin’ that new hairstyle NOW. Doing the pouty red lipstick NOW. Going to the fancy event NOW. Putting on the swimsuit NOW.

WhatEVER you’ve been delaying or waiting to do…Stop It.

I took the pics in this post because business coach and BARE creator, Susan Hyatt, put out a request for before and after pics. She normally doesn’t do this and asked because she’s written a wonderful book about BARE and a potential publisher wants visuals. She’s determined to change this old mindset and I have no doubt this book is going to Absolutely move that broken needle! It got me thinking how much my self-view has changed in the past several months since I’ve been coaching myself and clients on BARE.

Some of you will think: What is she talking about? She doesn’t have a weight issue. Others will think: She could drop a few pounds. Matters not. The question isn’t, Is you is or is you ain’t fat? I have clients at varying points on the weight continuum who call themselves fat, overweight, or feel unhealthy regardless of the visual.

The question is, Do you SEE yourself with love? That’s the first step towards treating yourself with love which leads to your body letting you know what feels like love and showing up for you in the way it was meant to: healthy and supportive in ALL the dreams you want to slay! BARE is not about delusion. It’s about accepting what IS and lovingly moving yourself to where you want to be. Women do lose weight(including moi)…lots of it. Physical AND mental and emotional.

I love dresses, but during the past several years I’ve worn them long or with leggings. This dress isn’t new, but the new thang is that I wore it without self-consciousness. It’s my ‘AFTER’. You can’t see it, but I KNOW it!

Ready to Free Your Mind AND your Body Drama?? Ask me about BARE.

cReneCoach.com

P.S. Only 3 spots left for Dancing in the Dark!! https://www.eventbrite.com/e/dancing-in-the-dark-coaching-tickets-33178980223

 

Who’s Life Are You Living?

I was a mess in my late teens/early twenties. Tagged ‘The Smart One’, I failed to live up to my potential and went home in shame from college on academic probation. I got a job at a grocery store(being a sofa slug was NOT an option with my parents) and tried to figure out my life. My mom sent me to a psychologist and the only thing I remember about that experience is his asking me what I wanted to do and my responding that I wanted a career in business.

I have no idea why I said that because most of my life my goal was to be a psychologist and my back-up options were librarian and proofreader. I probably believed that college failure meant those early aspirations were off the table and I just needed to work. He expressed doubt that I really meant that and I assured him I did.

“NOTHING IS WASTED. IT’S ALL INFORMATION.” ~ cReneCoach

Fast forward…Having escaped parental home/store clerk purgatory, I did end up in a corporate career and a pretty successful one at that! I completed my degree and moved around the company in several positions.

Eazy Peazy, right? Ummm, No! My mom used to say, “You always have to take the hard path.”

I completed my degree while I was in my company’s management training program, which included a 70 mile commute twice a week. After a few years in management, I decided it wasn’t for me(frequent crying was a sign!) and took the unprecedented risk of opting out to a non-management position. Ambition wasn’t a huge driver for me, but burning bridges was something to be avoided. Thankfully, my job transition was smooth and several years later, I made another internal move to an HR recruiter position and that’s when EVERYTHING changed! Cue the opera singer: I put a name to my avocational passion(coaching) and it felt like I’d finally found my work home.

And for awhile, I had.

Through four different HR positions including returning to management to run the corporate management training and softskill development programs, I honed my skill in and love for helping people get needed clarity and work success. And I also learned that psychologist was half right. I don’t love business in the general sense, but I ABSOLUTELY LOVE business on MY terms! When the misery returned and I knew there was nowhere else for me to move but out, I left. Some tough lessons, but in the words of the Wise and Wonderful Maya Angelou, I “wouldn’t take nothing for my journey now.”

The Group………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..The ‘Office’

The Paint Your Own Reality Retreat married everything I enjoy: coaching fabulous, motivated women in a beautiful location to clear their junk and drop the weight of what’s keeping them from Living Free! PYOR was inspired by the artist Frida Kahlo’s commitment to living life on her own terms…creatively and passionately…in spite of tremendous daily pain(physical and emotional).

The gleam you see in my eyes is my basking in the Blessing of Arrival. Every experience(good and bad), Every mistake, Every step forward and two back…ALL brought me to exactly where I’m supposed to be, doing exactly what I’m meant to do. Nothing wasted! And that gleam is there even though I didn’t make a penny (THAT won’t happen again! LOL), but the lessons learned re logistics and purpose are invaluable.

And the biggest lesson: Live. Your. Life.

Not what you ought to do…but what you’re meant to do.

Not what makes sense according to ‘they’…but according to YOU.

If you’re not ready to leap, take notes on what’s not working, what does excite you and Make A Plan.

There’s a Coach for that! Do it NOW.

C.René Washington

cReneCoach.com

P.S. Dancing In The Dark + Coaching is 60% sold! She who hesitates will miss out. You’ll be surprised at what you ‘see’ in the dark! Get in on the fun AND the enlightenment. Click here for full details and purchase, https://www.eventbrite.com/e/dancing-in-the-dark-coaching-tickets-33178980223